the anti vaccination movement basically consists of random people with no knowledge of medicine going “I can medicine better than doctors” and it would be hilarious if it wasn’t literally killing people
you dont need vaccines, I havent had any and Im still doing great
wow, what a compelling argument. you’ve got me
in other news, i am still alive therefore death must be a myth
MY GRANDMA GOT ALL A’S IN “ETIQUETTE” (YES THAT WAS AN ACTUAL CLASS IN HER HIGH SCHOOL) AND SHE TOLD ME, “DEAR,” SHE SAID,
“YOU NEVER CROSS YOUR LEGS, YOU CROSS YOUR ANKLES. BUT THE GREAT THING ABOUT YOU LIVING IN THIS GENERATION IS YOU DON’T HAVE TO FOLLOW MY GENERATION’S RULES. SIT THE WAY YOU WANT. IF SOMEONE LOOKS UP YOUR SKIRT, JUST TELL THEM YOUR AUNT MARY WILL KILL THEM.”
WHICH IS TRUE
MY AUNT MARY HAD A SWITCHBLADE IN A SPECIAL POCKET OF HER NIGHTGOWN UNTIL THE DAY SHE DIED
the moral of this story is
1. Sit the way you want.
2. My great aunt Mary was a fucking badass.
I kind of love the idea of Steve being bi. Like, when he was younger, he’d see a guy and think he was good looking, but he’d just stamp that down or chalk it up to being an artist and finding beauty in everything. Then he meets Peggy and he really likes her so he thinks of…
read more comics
#I THOUGHT THIS WAS GOING TO BE INSPIRATIONAL
it WAS inspirational
So I learned from my friend that coconut water can be used as an emergency blood transfusion, and of course my first thought was “So, can a vampire drink coconut water?”
and of course we had this idea of these tropical vampires being horrified when these old world vampires come and are still drinking blood like some sort of monster.
Write a book
My dad credits this as his favorite photo of me.
When I was younger, I was very socially anxious. I hated crowds, hated attention, hated being up on stage. In preschool there was this little Halloween show that we put on, and man, I did not want to do that shit, let me tell you. All those parents watching me sing some stupid song? Nah, that ain’t me.
But I was forced to, and I was pissed about it. My dad was in the audience, taking pictures and enjoying the show. In that moment, I swear, my tiny four year old was pure rage and resentment. I felt the word “fuck” years before I knew what it was.
My dad pointed the camera at me, and I turned, and I looked. I gave him the look that summed up all the anger, all the absolute fury that was brewing inside me. He says that he had never before seen such a perfect depiction of total and complete hatred. In his four year old son.
To this day whenever I get pissed, he calls me “Buzz Lightyear”.
pumpkins age like white people
JESUS FUCK I AM IN A CLASS AND I’M TRYING NOT TO LAUGH
Satan bein’ a bro
this was just maybe flat out my favorite part of this review because hi, true
for chinese new year they get all these famous actors and comedians together and they do a lil show and one of the comedians was like “i was in a hotel in america once and there was a mouse in my room so i called reception except i forgot the english word for mouse so instead i said ‘you know tom and jerry? jerry is here’
jerry is here
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN, MADONNA,
WAY BEFORE NIRVANA,
THERE WAS U2 AND BLONDIE,
AND MUSIC STILL ON MTV,
HER TWO KIDS IN HIGH SCHOOL TELL HER THAT SHE’S UNCOOL
BUT SHE’S STILL PRETTY PREOCCUPIED
You were waiting for this weren’t you
I waited my entire Tumblr career for this.
there’s always one hot person in an ensemble that you just end up sorta stalking throughout the show
"oh hey you’re really cute." "look you’re back as a villager." "oh there’s that guy being a police officer now." "you thought you could hide under that big costume but i see you cute ensemble member.”